Ang buhay ay parang sine

Wow! After 4months, nakabalik na ako.

2009-11-24T04:41:00.000-08:00

Yes! Nakabalik din ako sa aking tahanan. Naisip ko ulit itong buksan after 4 months. Hindi ko pa 'din kaya na mag-abandona ng blog ko. Medyo naging busy lang ako sa school works.

Anyways... Sa loob ng apat na buwan, madami 'din namang nangyari. Ang dami ko namiss nga pala sa mga ka-blogs ko! Hehe.

Ipagpapatuloy ko ulit magsulat dito, fellow bloggers, don't worry. I'll try to update as often as I can kahit medyo busy sa school. Para ma-destress na 'din.

Ayun, kamusta naman ako? Magkukuwento muna ako sa aking buhay. Kung anu ba ang nangyari sa akin ng 4months.

Kami pa 'din! Hindi ko talaga akalain na magtatagal kami ng ganito dahil napakadaming misunderstandings at mga away na hindi mo alam kung kailan matatapos. Dahil iyon sa akin. Dahil hindi ko minsan maintindihan ang pagDODOTA niya. Pero now, I'm trying to understand him more para magtagal ang relationship namin.

Masaya naman ang aking buhay sa STI. Nakakatuwa naman ang mga tropa ko dun. May mga bakla, may mga kikay, may mga kaugali ko din na medyo happy-go-lucky (Oo na, aaminin ko na!), may DOTA boys, may nerdies at may mga metal. Halos lahat nakakahalubilo ko doon dahil maliit lang naman ang aking school. Kumportable na 'din ako sa loob ng campus. Feeling ko, mas masaya talaga ako dito sa STI kaisa sa St. Dom. Oo, marami 'din kami naging bonding moments ng mga tropa ko sa St. Dom, kaso wala na eh, nabuwag na ang samahan namin dahil may kanya-kanya na 'din kaming mga trip sa buhay. Madalas ko silang nakikita sa SM. SM ang tambayan namin dahil tapat lang ng STI ang SM. Hindi na ako masyado nakikibonding sa kanila dahil wala lang, parang NaOOP na ako. Pero I still keep in touch naman sa kanila.

Haayy... Ngayon ko lang nadiscover na napakadaming events sa STI. Minsan, one week mga walang klase. G.E Week, Sports Fest, STI Cluster, STI Anniversary.. mga ganoong kachakahan ba.

P.S: Namimiss ko si BF. May kasalanan kasi ako :(

Waah sorry :(

Yehey! I'm back!

2009-07-11T05:10:00.000-07:00

Whoo! Super namiss ko kayo, mga kapwa kong bloggers. So how's life? Naku, Kuya Saul, ayan nagbabalik ulit ako after ng ilang linggo kong pagkawala kaya don't worry about me :) I'm in good shape. Andami ko tuloy ikukuwento sa inyo kaya asahan ninyo na mahaba - haba ang post na ito. Okay naman ang schooling ko, kahit nakakahaggard na sa sobrang dami ng pinapagawa pero pasalamat pa 'din ako dahil irregular ako kasi, hindi masyadong madami ang load ko kaya may time pa ako para makapagrelax at makipagbonding sa aking mga Dominican friends. At sa araw-araw na ginawa ni Bro, ako at ang aking mga classmates ay palagi na lang nakatambay sa SM dahil nasa tapat lang ng school ng ang SM. Doon kami natambay sa Quantum o kaya sa Tom's World. Wala pa ako gaanong makasundo sa mga classmates kong babae. Kaunti lang siguro. Siguro, yun yung mga taong sinasamahan ko talaga. Yung mga ibang classmates ko kasing babae ay hindi ko feel. Look, ayoko manghusga ng tao pero I'll try to be honest as much as possible: Naaartehan ako sa kanila. Parang tipo bang nasa loob ang kulo. Ay basta! Ayoko na talaga magsalita. Hehe. Then, ayun, nasama lang talaga ako sa mga taong alam kong mature na ang pag - iisip. Masaya naman sa STI kasi may inspirasyon ako. Oo, in love ako! Bumabalik ako na in - love ulit. Hehe. Nakamove on na kasi ako kay ex-boyfriend at sa hindi inaasahang pagkakataon, I finally found love in the arms of Daryl. He's my classmate. Second year siya. Bale, classmates ko siya sa dalawang subject, sa ProStat at sa P.E. Mabait siya, kahit mukha siyang Emo. Hahaha. Parehas kami mahilig 'din sa Music at sa movies pati sa laid-back life na tamang chill lang. Besides, matalino siya at masipag mag-aral. Ano pang hahanapin mo? Well, I broke my promise :( Hindi ko natupad ang summer resolution ko kasi hindi ko maresist ang isang taong katulad niya. Para bang, hypnotic talaga tsaka may certain effect siya sa akin whenever we have close encounters with each other. I don't wanna compare him to my ex pero he's the type na talagang super caring at ibibigay ang lahat just to make me happy. Last na talaga 'to. Pag hindi ito nagwork, ayoko talaga muna. BTW, eto pala ang picture namin. Pagpasensiyahan niyo na kung mukha kaming tanga dito. Hehe.

Second Day High

2009-06-17T01:54:00.000-07:00

Okay naman pala second day high ko dahil I finally managed to conquer my fear! Hehehe. Noong pumasok ako ng school, wala pa 'din ako kakilala on our second day of school pero noong matapos na yung isang subject namin ay kinausap ko na yung katabi ko. He's the same guy na tumabi sa akin pero hindi ako kinausap. Since dalawang sunod na araw ko na siya katabi, naisip ko kausapin ko na siya kaisa naman sa maiwan akong friendless, di'ba? Niyaya ko siya lumabas, kasama yung naging tropa na niya. Ayun, bonding kami doon sa tabi ng seven eleven. Mga thirty minutes lang kami nag-bonding doon kasi may Communication Arts pa kami ng 10:30. Noong pumasok ako at umupo doon sa usual naming kinauupuan, ayun, nakita ko yung isa pa 'din loner ng klase namin. Kinausap ko siya dahil noong unang araw ng klase, I feel the same way too. Lalaki siya pero sige, kinausap ko pa 'din siya. Turns out, mabait naman pala siya at kamukha siya ni Wu Chun pero tahimik siya, simple lang pumorma, payatot medyo at hindi long hair. Galing siyang PUP. So ayun, F4 na kami. Sinama namin siya sa SM noong lunch break. Tinext ko si Mike, yung tropa ko sa St. Dominic para makipagkita sa akin kasi ipapakilala ko yung mga new friends ko.

Ayun, sumobrang daldal ni Mike hindi ko tuloy alam kung nakakasakay ba yung mga new friends ko sa kanya! Haha. Tapos todo asaran kami ni Mike. Feeling ko, naoop sila sa amin pero tinry naman namin na hindi sila maop. At iyon and end ng second day of class ko. Haha. I won't go into details na.

Ang nangyari naman kanina is ok! Masaya kasi nakita ko yung mga tropa ko ulit sa St. Dom. Puro kasi talaga mga lalaki yung tropa ko. Siguro, mga walong lalaki yung kasama ko kanina pero ako lang ang babae. Hindi kasi ako masyado ma-tropa sa mga babae dahil boyish yung personality ko. Nakipagkita ako sa kanila sa SM after kong magpacredit ng Algebra, English at NSTP. Todo asaran kami doon sa loob ng food court tapos pinuntahan ako nung mga tropa ko. Absent si Jayson eh, kaya F3 lang kami kanina.

Then, noong pumasok na yung mga tropa kong lalaki, iniwan kami ni Kyrie (yung name ng isang tropa ko) ni Sean, yung Wu Chun look-alike kong tropa na din. So ayun, date kami sa lunch! Haha. Nailibre pa tuloy ako. Mabait naman siya. Tapos magkaklase pa kami doon sa isang subject namin na pang-second year din. Then, bilang kapalit nung paglibre niya sa akin, binigay ko na lang sa kanya yung sim card ko na globe para magglobe na din siya kasi smart siya para di'ba text-text kami tuwing gabi? Haha. Naulan din ngayon dito, at dahil wala akong payong, pinayungan niya ako at inantay niya muna ako makasakay. Layo pa kasi ng tinitirhan niya kaya hindi kami sabay. :(. Pero ok lang, at least may mga tropa na ako doon. :D

First Day High

2009-06-15T05:18:00.000-07:00

WARNING: Medyo mahaba ang post na ito kaya hindi ako magtataka kung kaunti lang ang mag-comment. Haha. Alam ko naman na yung iba sa inyo ay hindi nagbabasa ng mga mahahabang articles. Wala lang, gusto ko lang kasi i-share sa inyo ang nangyari sa akin ngayong first day of school in my new college :D

First day ng school kanina. Umalis ako sa bahay ng alas-siyete ng umaga at nakarating sa gate ng school namin ng seven-forty. Madaming tao sa labas ng gate, kasi hindi pa nagbubukas yung school. So ako loner dahil wala pa akong kakilala noon kaya naisip ko umupo sa isang tabi at maghintay na lang para magbukas yung gate. Ilang minuto 'din iyong paghihintay, at nakakaramdam ako ng pagkailang dahil sa estudyante na kasama ko sa labas. At noong nakaupo ako sa labas ng 7/11, may isang babaeng lumapit sa akin at nagtanong kung ano course ko. Too bad, Business Ad siya! At IT ako! Pumila kami muna sa labas bago pumasok ng loob ng school tapos kinuhanan kami ng temperatura sa thermal scanner bilang panlaban sa A(H1N1). Buti na lang, hindi tumaas temperatura ko kung hindi, baka maudlot pa pagpasok ko kanina. Handang - handa pa naman ako. Tapos, tinulungan ko si Aiyien (yung name ng babaeng nagpakilala sa akin) na hanapin ang room niya at hinanap ko yung room ko. Sa wakas, after one hundred years, nahanap ko na din ang room ko which is room 12!

So there I was, bonggacious ang entrance ko! Late ako kakahanap nung classroom ko. Tapos ayun, nahiya ako kasi nagtinginan sa akin yung mga new classmates ko. Umupo ako sa isang corner doon at tinabihan yung lalaking nakita ko (I have no intentions of flirting with him!) kasi yun yung nakita kong available na seat sa may likuran. At excuse me, I'm not the type of student na laging nasa harapan umuupo kasi ayoko na tinatawag ako ng prof ko. Haha. So there goes, nagorientation kami with our prof and ako, super out-of-place ako dahil wala nga ako kakilala and kahit noong matapos na yung buong period ay wala pa 'din ako kinakausap. Hindi naman dahil sa suplada ako or super ayoko lang mamansin - the truth is, napakamahiyain kong tao. Nahihiya pa ako makipagusap. Ewan ko, iyon 'ata ang isang ugaling hindi maaalis sa akin. Tapos noong nagdismissal na, there were only five people left in the classroom including me. Since I have nowhere to go (at hindi pa tapos ang klase noon ni Aiyien), nagstay muna ako ng classroom para hintayin yung text niya. Pero, sa kasamaang palad, na-empty ang cellphone ko. Kung minamalas ka nga naman oh!

Then, tumungo na lang ako. May tatlong lalaking nasa likuran ko at isang lalaki na nandoon sa may front row. Yung dalawang babae na nagkakilala na ay umalis na at ayun, bff na agad sila while I was left alone without a friend. Tapos, yung lalaking tinabihan ko kani-kanina lang ay tumabi ulit sa akin! Nagulat ako kasi sa dinami-dami ng vacant seats doon ay sa tumabi ulit siya sa akin. Feeling ko... may crush siya sa akin?! Haha. Joke lang iyon, guys! :D. I was just kidding. Tapos, noong umalis na yung lalaking iyon, umalis na 'din ako para magliwaliw sa buhay. Ang haba ba naman kasi ng break time ko. Imagine, 10:00 am ang dismissal namin tapos ang next subject ko ay 2:00 in the afternoon na magsisimula. Eh yung mga classmates ko sa St. Dom ay magkakaklase sila, which is very nakakainggit, at afternoon yung kinuha nilang schedule. Bale, 12 pa ng tanghali ang pasok nila. So good thing, nagtext na si Aiyien saying na tapos na yung klase nila. May kasama na siyang isang girl (nakakainggit talaga! May nakilala na siya!), si Anna. Naisip namin na magpunta sa SM para kumain ng lunch. It was 10 in the morning at 10:30 magsisimula ang next subject nila.

For about 15 minutes, humanap kami sa SM ng makakainan. Finally, we settled doon sa Pao Chin kasi nga, nagtitipid ang lola niyo at dieta ako no! Haha. So ayun, bago pa maluto yung Hainanese rice at yung shark's fin na inorder namin, umabot ito ng ten years. Malelate na sila tuloy. Nakabalik sila ng school ng saktong 11. Naisip ko na, since hindi ko naman mahanap yung mga classmates ko, umuwi na lang muna ako at bumalik ng 2 in the afternoon. 2 pm kasi ang time namin doon sa first period class namin sa hapon. Iyon pala, ang pinakamasaklap na pwedeng mangyari sa akin ay wala pala akong klase dahil next week pa ako papasok doon sa Programming subject ko! Malas na araw!!!! Napakamalas na araw!!!. Noong bumalik ako, tinext ako ni Bianca (our fellow blogger Bianca and also my classmate sa St. Dominic. Pero the bad thing here is... hindi ko classmate si Bianca ngayon pati si Nadine, yung classmate ko 'din dati sa St. Dominic). Tapos noong bumalik ako, mineet ko sina Nadine at Bianca sa hallway ng STI para masamahan nila ako magpapalit ng schedule ko sa office kasi gusto ko na maging kaklase ko sila dahil nahihirapan nga ako sa section ko na loner... super loner... at wala talagang kakilala ni isa. How sad di'ba? Pero ang bad news, HINDI AKO PINAYAGAN NG DEAN NA MAGPAIBA NG SCHEDULE KO :( So sad. Dapat 'daw noong bago magpasukan ko pa ito ginawa. Nagsisisi tuloy ako. Next time, sabay-sabay na kami mag-enroll nina Nadine at Bianca para maging magkakaklase kami.

Tapos noong lumabas kami sa office, nakita namin si Chester, yung classmate at tropa ko 'din dati sa St. Dominic. Lumipat 'din siya ng STI, kasama yung kambal-tuko niya na si Vyron. Nalaman ko na hindi pala sila BSIT, kung hindi DIT, which means, two years lang ang kinuha nilang course. Badtrip! Pati pala sila ay magkaklase. Loner talaga ako!!!! Haaay ayoko na!!!! So ayun, ako, si Chester, Nadine at Bianca ay rumampa muna ng ilang saglit sa loob ng STI. Nakakailang talaga kapag iba ang tingin sa'yo ng mga estudyante. Dahil ba new face ka lang sa campus? Whatever! Naiilang talaga ako at hindi ko alam kung makakasurvive ako ng ilang taon pa na ilalagi ko sa STI Campus. Haay, sana bukas magkaroon ako ng bagong mga friends kasi naman, kasi naman, ang problema lang kasi talaga sa akin ay ang pagiging snobbish look ko which is hindi naman totoo! Ika nga, don't judge a book by its cover. :D Hindi naman ako talaga suplada, mukha lang. Hindi lang talaga ako mukhang approachable pero kapag nakilala niyo ako, mabait naman ako. :D

Blog promotion

2009-06-13T23:12:00.000-07:00

You know guys that I'm always fond of promoting blogs to support our other fellow bloggers to expand their followers. I've got two blogs to promote to you:

Visit my former schoolmate and a good writer, Abbey's blog. She used to rant here in blogger but decided to move to tumblr (well, I'm also planning to move there, too but heck, I'm still undecided): BIA FOR SHORT. Please do support this blog, guys!

And of course, my friends' blog (I do write there sometimes): THE SEVEN STARS BLOG.

Support the Filipino youth blog! Hehe. :D

Because Breaking up is hard to endure

2009-06-12T07:41:00.000-07:00

Have you ever found yourself crying in the middle of the night and constantly asking (in between sobs and tears) yourself, "Why? Why? Why?". Most of us had experienced a break-up that seems really impossible to recover from. Think you can't handle the situation? Well, folks, think again! It's time to do the repacking of the memories you had shared together and seal it in a bag - forever! Here are the tips for surviving a break-up:

Try to practice self-confidence instead of wallowing in self-pity. Yes, I know it's tough but the more you pity yourself, the more depressed you will feel. Instead of saying that he stopped loving you because you think you're fat, you're ugly, he cheated on you, you've gained some weight, you've lost the bombshell in you and you name it - say to yourself that, "I'm pretty and I know a lot of guys will ogle on me. Life's not over and it is just starting right now! There's so much opportunities out there now that I'm single. How could I miss it?". Warning: Don't say it to other people. You're talking to yourself and it's okay to say those things because it'll make you feel good about yourself.

Go and have a fun night with your girlfriends. Friends will always be there whenever you need company! So it's time to hit the club and party with your best-est girlfriends until dawn! Go dance the night away and feel the energy of the music that surrounds you. It'll make you feel energized and yes, it helps you to forget all of your worries.

Try to avoid watching romance movies. I'm not saying that you have to quit watching cheesy, romantic movies forever! Since watching romance movies can you make you a little bit of nostalgic thinking about how you two once became the Romeo and Juliet (minus the star-cross'd lovers thingy!) that is similar to the movie that you're watching, you might end up crying and feel totally devastated. Instead, try watching sci-fi, action, comedy and horror movies for just a little while.

Do the things that you love the most whether it's biking, shopping, drawing or blogging, you'll appreciate the quality time that you're giving yourself now that you have so much 'me' time that's on your toes. You'll feel relaxed and it will make you busy so that you'll avoid thinking of him.

Surround yourself with the people that you love. Since being in a relationship tend you to spend a less time with your loved ones, now's the time to bond with them and catch up with their lives! They might give you some helpful advice for you to move on and get a life.

Tumblarity

2009-06-08T07:35:00.000-07:00

Just an update: Tumblr is cool! But I'm still undecided what to post there.

Here's the link: http://akosichase.tumblr.com

My Friends' Blog

2009-06-07T07:26:00.000-07:00

Heyyah guys! My friends are now into blogging, too! So please visit their blog at this link:

THE SEVEN STARS BLOG

Please do support my friends' blog and please do add them in your link, guys! :D

Just hit it

2009-06-06T08:49:00.000-07:00

Lately, I've been imagining a lot of silly things - that I am Bella Swan living in the town of Forks, Washington and when I entered a new school, I'll meet a guy as handsome as Edward Cullen and fall in-love with him even though he's a drop dead gorgeous vampire. Silly, right? But that's not the real deal behind my Twilight-esque imagination. The real deal is that: My little town of Kawit, Cavite looks dull and cold every morning I wake up similar to that of Forks (if you had read Twilight and watched the movie, then you get the message). Why? 'Cause it's the rainy season, guys! People here in my town are now wearing jackets and caps and are donning on their dull-colored umbrellas because they've gotten tired of sleeveless shirts, micro mini-shorts and their tan complexion. It's really fun to sit back and relax while curled up in a good book or with a good movie while lying down on a soft bed armed with a warm blanket, sipping a cup of coffee and just enjoying the shivery weather. Amazing, right? But since I'm bored to death (and to think that miraculously, I didn't even had the chance to go outside for a week which is really kind of tormenting!), I decided to call my pals to see if they're available this day. I then managed to tag Regine and Camille with me, two of my best gal pals in our group. We hit the mall wearing our jackets (I didn't bring an umbrella with me since I don't like bringing one. I prefer my hoodie) and decided to watch a really good movie for that last minute summer vacation bonding. We watched 'Drag Me To Hell'. It was a pretty scary movie. It reminds me of The Exorcist and The Exorcism of Emily Rose but the difference is that, the main character of the movie is not possessed by the demons but instead, they wanted her soul. If you never watched the movie, then I'll stop typing 'cause I don't wanna spoil your plans. But I do recommend that if you're into the horror genre, then you should watch this one! It's worth the money (fine, there's a DVD coming after a month so maybe you could watch it there instead of paying a hundred and twenty bucks to the movie theater). Here are some of the stills of Drag Me to Hell:

Summer means...

2009-06-05T03:28:00.000-07:00

Dahil malapit na ang pasukan, itong post na ito ay tribute ko sa ginawa ko noong summer:

Kain, Tulog, Puyat hanggang 6 am ng umaga, Laboy hanggang gabi, Tambay sa bahay ng tropa, Pumunta ng mga Birthday ng tropa, Magpictorial, Maglinis ng Kuwarto, Magblog, MagFacebook, MagFriendster, Maglaro ng Pet Society, Manood ng TV, Magsimba noong Holy Week, Magbasa ng blogs, Makipagchismisan sa phone, Makipaginuman ng isang lata ng red horse sa labas ng SM sabay uwi, Magswimming, Magbasa ng Libro at Magenroll. :D

I'm back!

2009-06-04T03:21:00.000-07:00

Yehey, nagbabalik ulit ako after 5 days na hindi nakapagpost. Paano ba naman, masyadong naaddict ako sa Pet society sa Facebook kaso eto noong maglalaro ulit ako ng Pet Soc, bigla na lang pagkatingin ko, Under Maintenance. Malas nga naman. Wala naman ako ikukuwento dahil wala namang bago sa akin. Wala lang, trip ko lang mag-blog ngayon. Tsaka pasensiya na nga pala sa mga ka-bloggers ko na hindi ko nabibisita these past few days. Naaddict kasi ang lola niyo, pero namiss ko talaga kayo. Tsaka lagi 'din ko tulog. Kung hindi naman tulog, laging nasa labuyan kasama ang tropa dahil kaunting araw na lang, magsisimula na naman ang pasukan. June 15 pa ang pasukan sa STI, di'ba Bianca? Pero naiinip na ako kasi miss na miss ko na ulit bumalik sa buhay estudyante at pangngalawang taon ko na 'din sa buhay kolehiyo ko. O siya, hanggang dito na lang muna ang post ko. Ala kasi ako maisip ilagay ngayon eh.

A candlelit evening

2009-05-29T06:34:00.000-07:00

This is my (okay... I'm not bragging about it) award-winning piece from the Division Schools Press Conference Training held last September 2007 in Perpetual Molino Campus. I couldn't find the copy of my Magdalenean newspaper on my bag but thanks to Rob, he posted this piece on his blog and if you allow me to Rob, let me repost it. As I was saying, I am the representative of our school to compete for the Feature Writing in English alongside with Ciara, the representative of Feature Writing in Filipino. I didn't go there to win. I was hoping that I should try my luck and write from my heart. Competition is not included in my system. I was just there to write and nothing more. The topic of the competition is: "What does prayer mean to you?". And what would I write? I have nothing to write. Nothing's decent is coming in to my mind. If I could write five sentences, that would be lucky for me. No, I shouldn't say the word lucky. I should say the word fortunate. It was an on-the-spot competition and we're given a one hour time to finish the essay. As I sat there on the cold, silent room, I think I'm gonna burst in tears! I don't really know what to write to tell you honestly. But then, God must be so good to lend me his power for just a little while so as not to embarass the holy name of our school - St. Mary Magdalene's School. Luckily, I managed to write something but the last problem would be: How would I end this thing? A woman who's on the room said that there's only two minutes left. That made me cry. This is really embarrassing, I thought. But then, God lend me his power some more to end the essay in a very decent manner. When the awarding ceremony came, I was enthralled with the fact that I have actually won first place in my category! And what's the great plus here? I actually bested 45 private school students and even the last year's champion? Talk about luck or tsamba. Now here's this piece (no, I don't wanna call it a 'masterpiece' 'cause that would be too much). Tell me what you think about it guys.

A dark night. A wooden table. A small candle. A tear.

My emotion won over my innocence as we gathered around a wooden table. Darkness filled the whole room. The silence was deafening. As time passed by, silence pained and slaughtered me each and every second.

The pain of seeing my father and my mother separating after so many years of what seemed like an everlasting love was intolerable. I watched the candle’s fire dance rhythmically and modestly with the unseen cold wind. I saw the glimmering eyes of my sister. It was not caused by the candlelight; it was because of her bitter tears.

“Please, Mom… Dad, don’t leave us,” she begged while gripping into my mother’s arms.

“We can’t stay together. It is my fault. I have to pay for this,” sobbing, my mother answered. My sister turned to my father but he did not answer.

What could a little child do? Nothing. I could not do anything. I excused myself from the painful gathering and as I explored the place which I considered home, my feet led me to my mother’s room. Inside it, I saw a crucifix and an altar lit with scented candles. then I said to Him, “If I cannot bring back the happiness I used to have before, You can take my life away.” For that very moment, Happiness was all in oblivion.

Then suddenly, something changed. There was finally warmth that touched my hollow heart. I then realized the essence and magic of prayer.

Prayer is like a dark night. You cry, you stumble and you fall but still there is a new tomorrow that brings new hope.

Prayer is like a wooden table. If you keep on believing, you will realize that you, as a human being, can face and overcome any life’s storm.

Prayer is like a small candle. It may be gone for a while but if you strive to find the light that you search in your life, time will come when you will be enlightened.

Prayer is like a tear. It falls but it never runs out.

Prayer is a candlelit evening. You may think that prayers are left unanswered, but soon you will get to understand that the more you dig, the more you find the enlightenment.

Darkness is just temporary. Prayer can overcome it. I may have failed to reconcile my parents but I am sure that God has beautiful plans for me. He might have made my life like a candlelit evening but I do not get mad. No matter what, I still fervently believe that through my prayer, my life will end up standing and burning - ready to forget the absurdity and melancholy that yesterday gave me.

Pendant: Part I posted.

2009-05-27T06:56:00.000-07:00

Okay, naipost ko na ang kaepalan ng aking 'high-school chuvaness memory' sa link na ito:

IMAHINASYON! CLICK IT!

Hinide ko yung comments kaya doon na lang kayo magkumento sa aking shoutbox. Hehe. :D. Sana magustuhan niyo. I'll gonna post the story by parts kasi.

Istorya blog link

2009-05-26T05:57:00.001-07:00

Mga kapwa kong bloggers, eto na ang link sa istorya blog ko. Wala pa akong istoryang naipopost diyan. Introduction lang yan ng unang istorya na ifi-feature ko. Bisitahin niyo at add niyo na din sa inyong links. Salamat!:

IMAHINASYON! CLICK NIYO 'TO

Istorya blog

2009-05-26T01:22:00.000-07:00

Mga kapwa kong bloggers, gusto ko lang sana ipaalam na magkakaroon ako ng 'Story Blog'. Bukod pa itong 'Ang buhay ay parang sine blog' doon. Kaya add niyo din yung upcoming story blog ko. Ito yung mga collection ko ng short stories, long stories (novel na bang maitatawag yun? Haha) at kung anu-anu pang kaepalang ginagawa ko kapag ako'y bored. Kaya kung boring kayo, click niyo lang ang story blog ko sa links niyo at basahin niyo ang mundong puno ng imahinasyon. Hindi ko pa siya nagagawa, kasi ni-re-retrieve ko pa yung mga sulat-kamay kong istorya doon sa aking mahiwagang baul. Sana suportahan ninyo at kapag nagawa na, please spread the word. :D

Nakita ko siya

2009-05-24T06:42:00.000-07:00

Kanina, nakita ko siya. Hindi ko alam kung anong gagawin ko. Gustong-gusto kong lapitan siya ngunit may isang puwersang pumigil sa akin upang gawin iyon. Ano nga ba? Natatakot ako na baka hindi niya ako pansinin? Natatakot ako na baka ako'y kanyang sisihin? Ngunit... bakit ako matatakot kung hanggang ngayo'y siya pa 'din ang nasa puso ko? Handa ako. Handang-handa ako sa kung anuman ang mangyayari sa tagpong iyon. Halos malusaw ang aking kaluluwa na unting-unting sumusugat sa aking puso habang pinagmamasdan ko siya sa malayo. Ayun siya't naglalakad, ngunit ang aking bawat pasulyap ay nakaw sapagkat ayokong makita niya ang sugat na unting-unting kumikirot sa aking katawan. May sakit na nagising sa aking kalooban. Ang sakit na hindi ko maipaliwanag kung gaano kahapdi. Para bang, sinusugatan ako ng blade ng paulit-ulit at ito'y binubuhusan ng alcohol hanggang sa hindi na nito mahanap ang paghilom dahil ang sugat ay napakalalim na at ito'y kinakailangan ng tahiin upang ang lahat ay bumalik sa dati at magsarado ang nakaraan. Naaalala ko ang nakaraan. Ang nakaraan na gustong-gusto ko pa din balikan. Dati rati, hindi nakaw ang sulyap ko sa kanya. Tinititigan ko ang kanyang mga mata na umaagos hanggang sa kaibuturan ng kanyang kaluluwa at doo'y sinasabi ko na 'Mahal na mahal kita'. Ngunit hindi ko na magagawa. May isang malaking pader na humaharang upang ako'y mapalapit sa kanya. Kung maibabalik ko nga lang ang lahat ngunit ang pag-asa ay naglaho ng parang bula. Hindi bale, masaya na ako para sa kanya. Sapagkat alam ko, malapit niya na maabot ang rurok ng tagumpay. Ngunit ang nakakalungkot na parte sa kasiyahang ito ay... wala ako para makisaya sa kanya. :(

Salamat!

2009-05-22T13:11:00.000-07:00

Yehey! Nanalo ako! Salamat ng marami sa inyo, mga kapwa kong blogger, dahil sinuportahan niyo ako sa prestihiyosong Chorva Blog Awards na ito. Napakalaking bagay sa akin ang manalo dito, sapagkat unang-una, gusto kong mapalawak pa ang mga bumabasa ng bawat artikulong sinusulat ko mula sa blog site na ito at pangalawa, para na 'rin sa exposure ko (oh ayan, straight-to-the-point na ako. Haha!). Sa mga bumoto sa akin, maraming maraming salamat! Asahan niyo na kapag kayo naman ang nominado sa isang patimpalak na kagaya nito, wag kayo magatubili na humingi ng suporta sa akin. Basta... maraming maraming salamat talaga sa inyong lahat. :D

EHEM! EHEM! KAUNTING ADVERTISEMENT LAMANG: Bisitahin niyo naman ang blog site ng fellow blogger natin na si Mr. Rob Jeremiah Nuguid. Promise - he's really a good blogger! Eto po yung blog site niya: http://throbe.co.cc. Open siya sa exchange links.

Goodbye, SDCAS. Hello STI.

2009-05-18T09:40:00.000-07:00

As the first day of school come this June approaches, I can't help but feel melancholic, nostalgic and nervous. I'll be leaving my former school, St. Dominic College of Arts and Sciences and will be transferring to STI College - the real home for an IT professional in the making like me. The reason for my departure to SDCAS? It's because of the incompetency of the IT Department. They failed to give us knowledge to further understand and hone our craft in programming and in enhancing our analytical thinking and logic reasoning. The other instructors in the IT Department are unprofessional since they tend to take the student's negative attitude personally. And the consequence for acting like such a jerk to your instructors? Failing grades. That's how immature, unprofessional and incompetent the IT Department is. We need comprehensive and intensive learning, not behavioral learning. Of course, as an IT professional in the making, we need to straighten our behavior, too but that's for us to learn all by ourselves and we don't need a book nor do we need an instructor for the betterment of our etiquette when we enter the corporate world four years after the painstaking process for us to be on top of the ladder. So enough of the negative remarks about the IT Department of my former school. I wanted to share to you my most cherished moments through my one school year of staying at SDCAS.

Okay, let me tell you the story behind why I chose to study to SDCAS instead of enroling at STI. This is the most pathetic and lamest excuse I can come up with - for me to be with my ex-boyfriend. I never really plan on taking up IT because I'm no computer genius like my other classmates. I suck at Math which means, I'm no good in programming. Programming sure needs a lot of Math. The course that I really want to take up is Mass Communication because I want to see myself on the TV clad with a serious face in a calm but reasonable tone and delivering some lines in front of thousands and thousands of people watching the news. I wanted to be the next Korina Sanchez - but my dreams are falling apart right on my feet because of the crazy little thing called love. I was so stupid of giving up my own dream just to be with my ex-boyfriend and look at me now - I'm alone and I'm single and I'm regretting it. But it's okay, I am now taking the IT world seriously and I wanted to enhance my skills much as I would like to be successful in the field that I've chosen.

So what are my most precious moments of staying at SDCAS? First, meeting my coolest, craziest and loudest friends. At SDCAS, I've been friends with almost all of my classmates, which means I don't have even a single enemy on my section which makes my stay at SDCAS more meaningful. But since I'm one-of-the-boys kind of girl, I'm closest with the guys. I get along with them pretty well because they perfectly understand my boyish personality, my fondness of eating street foods and my bizarre habits. I usually do trash-talking with them and I'm more comfortable talking that way. Aside from that, our late-in-the-night talking, inuman and laughing out loud sessions. We like talking about anything under the sun up to the latest gadgets, my latest crush and the latest happenings on campus. We're fond of doing sleepovers on each other's houses. They've slept in my house way too many times already and after a crazy night, my house looks like it had been hit by a tornado. I swear, they're gross and messy but that's the way I like them. They've also been there beside me through thick and thin. They always, always support me in my dreams and they never fail to cheer me up when I'm suffering on a bad hair day. And I'm gonna miss my band, Ampersand! Composed of Me doing vocals, Glenn for drums, Kenneth for bass and Fridz for lead and rhythm guitars. We do covers of Paramore's songs. And I'll never forget the day that Fridz taught me how to play Paramore's songs. It's been three years since I last hold of of a guitar and the strings feels rough and painful to me but I don't mind. Haha! And I'll also never forget the day that I sang "My Immortal" acoustic version on stage in front of the other college students of SDCAS! I know as a vocalist of a band, I should have to gain enough confidence so that I'll be able to perform on some of the gigs really well. But unfortunately, the band disbanded and I'm planning to form a new one at my new school. Ah well, I guess that's life. And what's more? My SDCAS friends taught me how to bathe in the rain like you just don't care! Okay so you can get sick and everything, but I don't really mind. Life's too short to waste and according to my own life's dogma, 'Experience the experience and you're not getting any younger for you to take a slice of adventure'. Maybe if I would have to enumerate the things why it's seems so hard to forget SDCAS, I am pretty sure that I'll end up reciting my story 'til tomorrow.

So there I am come this June... facing a new life. I'll be meeting new friends, new crushes, new instructors and will be loading up on new subjects. Now wish me luck guys! I'm still nervous. :(

Summer resolution

2009-05-17T01:46:00.000-07:00

It's not always in the holidays that you can come up with a resolution. You can do such on a time like this - where boredom is excruciating and is getting into your nerves. Last night on my room, while my favorite cousin Monique is sleeping, I grabbed my new notebook and my trusty old pen and wrote about anything that's disturbing my wide, imaginative and simply witty mind (oh come on fellow blogger/s, I'm saying this in an opposite manner). Turns out, I came up with a SUMMER RESOLUTION! I'm dying to share my summer resolution to you guys:

No boyfriend for 6 months! (I swore on that but then it never happened. Maybe it will work out this time. *cross fingers*)
Be a more understanding person
Never, ever say something that I will regret later on!
Be a brutally honest person (But sometimes, I can't help but lie! Oh bad me! Why should I have to lie? Human nature, eh?)
Take care of my own home (My blog! My blog! Sometimes when I'm very, very busy, I tend to forget on coming up with a new post on my blog so this time, I'll take care of it!)
Learn not to fall in love in the spur-of-the-moment because I might end up feeling infatuated instead of falling in love. (That never works, either!)

Pagsulat

2009-05-15T00:51:00.000-07:00

BAGO KO PO SIMULAN ANG POST NA ITO AY HUMIHINGI LANG PO AKO NG KAUNTING TULONG SA INYO, AKING MGA FELLOW BLOGGER, NA IBOTO PO AKO SA CHORVA BLOG AWARDS. NARITO PO ANG LINK: http://chorvacheorvamus.blogspot.com/ AKO PO KASI AY NOMINADO. NASA SIDEBAR LANG PO NG NASABING BLOG ANG POLL, AT NAROON PO ANG PAMAGAT NG AKING BLOG: ANG BUHAY AY PARANG SINE. SA MGA BUMOTO NA, MARAMING MARAMING SALAMAT PO. AT SA MGA HINDI PA NAKAKABOTO, BUMOTO NA PO KAYO! MARAMING MARAMING SALAMAT PO.

Ano nga ba ang pagsusulat para sa akin? Kung ako'y inyong tatanungin, marami akong maaring kahulugan na ibigay ng pagsusulat. Na ang pagsusulat ay isang hobby... Na ang pagsusulat ay ang panandaliang pagtakas sa realidad. Na ang pagsusulat ay ang sumasalamin sa ating pagkatao... sa ating kaluluwa... sa ating buhay at sa ating mapaglarong isipan.

Bata pa lang ako, hilig ko na ang pagsusulat. Isang umaga, alas-singko ng umaga sa aking pagkakatanda, ay pinasok ko ang isang lumang kuwarto na siyang imbakan ng aking mga kuwaderno at kung anu-anu pang papel na ang laman ay ang aking mga sinulat na tula, kuwento at ng aking mga nadarama. Naisip ko na.. "Aba, nag-improve na pala ako sa aking pagsusulat".

Gusto ko maging katulad ni William Shakespeare, ni Bob Ong, ni Emily Dickinson at ni Rainer Maria Rilke... ngunit, kailangan kong gumising sa isang realidad na hindi ako magaling magsulat. Ngunit pinipilit kong magpakahusay, dahil ito ang aking pangarap. Ang pagsusulat, para sa isang katulad ko, ay hindi lamang isang simpleng hobby o isang eskapo sa tunay na buhay... ngunit ang pagsusulat ay aking buhay.

Ito ang nagpapalakas sa akin. Ito ang nagpapawala ng aking mga suliranin. Ito ang lahat-lahat para sa akin. Mapa-blog man yan o old school, wala na sa akin iyon... basta ako'y makapagsulat lamang. Iniisip ko, kung gagaling ako, anung mapapala ko? Sisikat? Bibigyan ng parangal?

Ngunit sa aking bawat sinusulat, isa lamang ang aking pakay - ang makapagpabago ng buhay ng ilan na sumusubaybay sa bawat artikulong sinusulat ko, mapa-Ingles man o Tagalog. Marami na akong nakikilala na buhay na 'din nila ang pagsusulat, at natutuwa ako sa kanila dahil marami 'din palang nakakaintindi ng aking hilig.

Natutuwa din ako, sapagkat, ang aking mga magulang, kapamilya at aking mga kaibigan ay nauunawaan ang pagkahumaling ko sa isang mundong punung-puno ng letra, tagumpay at pagkabigo.

Pagsulat... ito na ang aking buhay. Pagsulat... hindi ako mabubuhay ng wala ka.

Lab at prenship

2009-05-13T09:12:00.000-07:00

Rachelle: Mare, I feel so bad.

Me: Why?

Rachelle: Kasi, binawi na niya yung promise na iniwan niya sa akin dati.

Me: And what's that promise?

Rachelle: Na hindi niya ako iiwan. Na together forever na kami.

Sigh, fellow bloggers. It's about love that we're talking about today. No, it's not all about me but it's all about my friend Rachelle's dilemma. She texted me this afternoon telling me that she and her boyfriend got into a fight.
I rushed to her house because I felt this strong urge to comfort her as she mourn... to pat her shoulder and telling her that everything is going to be alright... and listen as she bitches about her problem though I could hardly hear it for her voice was so soft.
She told me that her boyfriend's giving her a cold shoulder. She even told me that when they do talk, they couldn't think of anything to talk to. It's like, when they talk - it's nothing but pure BOREDOM.
Rachelle asked me for advice since she knows that I've been there before. And what advice could I give her? I'm not good in giving advices simply because I can't give a good advice to my own bad self. But since I love her as my friend and that I don't want her to feel alone, I tried my best to cheer her up and gave her my own understanding about boys (not men, I still can't fathom men as of this moment). I told her this: "Alam mo mare, eto lang yan ha? Kung hindi ka handa magsacrifice, kung hindi ka handa na ibigay ang lahat, ilet-go mo na kasi sa bandang huli ikaw din ang mahihirapan kung hindi 100% yung nararamdaman mo sa isang tao. Marami pa naman diyan eh, maganda ka naman at marami din naman nagkakagusto sa'yo. Pero eto lang, kung talagang ayaw mo siya mawala sa'yo, subukan mo kayang alamin kung anu yung gusto niya? Kunware, mahilig siya sa basketball, kahit hindi ka mahilig, edi subukan mong magkaroon ng kahit kaunting alam para naman may mapagusapan kayo. Kasi ang mga lalaki, hindi lang puro pa-sweet ang hinahanap niyan sa girlfriend, gusto 'din nila ng isang kaibigan na puede nilang sabihan ng kahit anung mga hilig nila. Gusto din kaya nung mga lalaki na minsan, may boyish personality 'din yung isang babae, yun kasi yung masarap kasama eh."

I hope I got it right. That's my own understanding about the nature of boys, based on my experience with my ex. I tried my best to know a thing or two about skateboarding and Tau Gamma Phi, his fraternity so that we have something to talk about when we couldn't think of anything else to talk about. But of course, a healthy relationship should also learn the value of "give and take". It's a cliche principle but more often than not, it works. If you always, always talk about your bf/gf's favorites (e.g basketball, makeup), what about your own likes? A relationship isn't a relationship without the virtues of love and friendship. And I am thankful that as of this moment, though I honestly admit that I'm not good in giving advices, my friend and her boyfriend are finally okay. Looks like, I should have to shift to a new career: A love guru. Haha. LOL.

Pritong manok

2009-05-12T09:39:00.001-07:00

Oo, aking mga kapwa blogger - kapatid ko iyang nasa litratong iyan kahit mukha akong katulong kapag kasama ko siya. Napakaputi niya. Napakaganda. Napakasexy. Napakatalino. Parang halos 'ata lahat ng NAPAKA nasakanya na. Kung mayroon nga lang isang sister's day, siguro, gagawa ako pero huli na... huli na ang lahat para magkaroon pa ng sister's day. Hindi kami nag-uusap. Limang buwan na ang nakakaraan.
Oo nga pala, bago ko simulan ang isang istorya ay ipinapakilala ko sa inyo ang aking kapatid na si Corrine Rojo Soriano, 25 anyos at nagtatrabaho bilang isang Level 5 Bank Teller sa Banco de Oro, Mall of Asia Branch. Tatlong taon na siyang loyal sa kumpanyang ito.
Ano nga ba ang istorya sa likod ng aming hindi pagpapansinan? Sabihin ninyong napakababaw ng aming pinagawayan pero kung ating susuriin, napakababaw naman talaga. Tungkol lamang ito sa isang hita ng pritong manok na nakalatag sa ibabaw ng plato sa aming mesa at nagaanyaya upang siya'y kainin ko dahil ang aking sikmura ay kumakalam na.
Kagagaling ko lang noon ng aming retreat, at dahil sa isang kakaibang klima, mula Tagaytay pabalik ng Kawit, mula malamig hanggang sa mainit, ay nagkasakit ako. Kailangan kong kumain. Kailangan kong magkaroon ng laman ang aking sikmura upang ako'y makainom ng gamot. Kumain ako, dahil bukod sa gutom na gutom na ako ng mga panahong iyon ay paborito ko ang fried chicken. Ngunit diyahe, nandoon ang boyfriend niya.
Ehem mga ka-bloggers, ayoko ng i-mention ang pangngalan ng boyfriend niya dahil baka mapahiya. So, as usual, nandoon na naman ang boyfriend niya sa bahay namin para magdinner. Nakisabay ako, siyempre dahil ka-close ko na 'rin naman ang boyfriend ng ate ko. Pero noong kinuha ko ang isang hita ng manok (na siyang ulam namin noong gabing iyon) ay nagalit ang ate ko sa akin dahil sinabi niya na pagkain daw nila yun. Nagpanting ang tenga ko, para bang nakakabingi na para bang isang kanta mula sa isang Death Metal band.
Ano daw?! Pagkain daw nila iyon?! Samantalang ang pritong manok ay ulam namin! Puede naman siguro magluto ng ibang ulam eh. Nakadalawang hirit na iyong boyfriend niya ng pritong manok, samantalang isang hita lamang ang kinain ko at napakaliit pa.
Kaya iyon ang pinagugatan ng aming istorya kung bakit hanggang ngayon ay hindi pa 'din kami nagpapansinan. Ayaw naman makielam ang Mama ko sa away namin, dahil alam niya ang ugali ng ate ko na medyo matigas ang loob.
Isipin natin, medyo matigas 'din ang loob ko pero lumalambot kapag usapang pampamilya na. Gusto ko na talagang makipagbati sa ate ko, ngunit hindi ko alam kung paano sisimulan.
Gusto ko makipagbati sa kanya. Tanggap ko na na mas mahalaga ang boyfriend niya kaisa sa amin. Paano ba naman kasi, apat na taon na sila noong lalaking iyon at pakiramdam ko nga ay sila na ang ikakasal. Matanda naman 'din kasi sila pareho.
Hay ewan ko ba. May maibibigay ba kayong payo sa akin mga ka-bloggers para magbati na kami ng ate ko? Hay ewan ko ba oh, kapag umiral nga naman ang pagkabata.

Things to do before I turn 35!

2009-05-11T02:49:00.000-07:00

I don't mind being 30 but I do mind being 35. So if destiny will allow me to do so, there are a lot (and I do mean a lot!) of things to do before I turn 35. So here are those things:

Go bungee jumping in Indonesia!
Shop 'til I drop in New York!
Have a dinner on the sidewalk cafeterias of Paris and see the Eiffel tower!
See The Last Supper in Santa Maria Dela Grazie!
Go to Honolulu, Hawaii and take my friends there to enjoy the sun!
Party at Boracay!
See the Petronas Tower in Malaysia!
Go to Hong Kong Disneyland!
See the ruins of Athens most especially the Parthenon - the most copied architecture in the world!
Eat authentic Japanese food at Tokyo!
Live for one year on the English countryside!
Explore the Alps in Switzerland!
Read a book beside a lake in Finland!
Ride a gondola in Venice!
Visit the Louvre Museum in France!
See the Leaning Tower of Pisa in Italy!
Go bargain hunting in Bangkok!
Visit the Great Wall of China!
Go to Washington D.C and meet Barack Obama!
Have a picture taken with Manny Pacquiao in Saranggani Province!
Visit Baguio!
Produce in Indie Film!
Publish a novel!
Make a website!
Have a two-week vacation in Amsterdam!
Visit the Buckingham Palace in London!
Visit the Taj Mahal in Agra, India!
Eat an authentic shawarma in Iran!
Stay for a night in the Al Burj Dubai Hotel!
Make a snowman in Korea!
See the Gothic Cathedrals in Germany!
See the Ancient Mayan Civilization in Mexico!
Get married at the age of 25!
Have 3 kids! A girl and a boy!
Have a solid band!
Learn to play the drums!
Go to mass at the Vatican!
Live in a manor in England!
Go to Hollywood!

Yipee! Getting really ambitious but that's okay. I took this ambitious pill and swallowed it like crazy. Dreams do come true. I know that.

Ang mabuting ina. Bow. Isang tunay na istorya.

2009-05-09T20:56:00.000-07:00

Mga kapwa blogger, pagpasensiyahan niyo na kung ganyan ang litrato ng aking super duper mama in the world! Stolen lang niyan noong Nobyembre 1, 2008. Nakakasigurado ako na eto hindi man lahat, pero yung ibang ka-fellow blogger ko ay ito ang pakay ng kanilang post - upang batiin ang kanilang mga butihing ina ng isang malutong at masarap pakinggan sa tainga na: Happy Mother's Day, Ma... Inay... Mommy... Inang... Oh kahit ano pa ang inyong tawag!

Ngunit teka, gusto kong pakinggan ninyo ang aking kuwento tungkol sa aking Mama. Ipinapakilala ko siya bilang si Milagros Celestial Rojo. Actually, hindi talaga siya ang tunay kong nanay. Tiyahin ko lang siya, nakakatandang kapatid ng aking tunay na nanay. Wala siyang asawa dahil pinagkaitan ng tadhana na magkaroon ng asawa. Buong buhay niya kasi, simula pagkabata, iniukol na niya para sa kanyang pamilya. Nagalaga ng mga nakababatang kapatid, tinulungan ang kanyang mga magulang sa pagtatrabaho upang mabuhay at hindi na nakapag-aral pa dahil kailangang magbanat ng buto. Samantalang ang kanyang ibang mga kapatid, ang aking mga tiya at tiyuhin, ay nakapagtapos ng kolehiyo at hayun, naroon na sa Amerika at mayroon ng isang maganda at matatag na buhay. American Citizen na sila, kumbaga. Samantalang ang Mama ko (Tawag ko sa aking tiyahin), American Citizen na nga, pero hindi pa 'rin makapunta ng Amerika dahil natatakot siya na iwanan kami.

Kaming tatlong magkakapatid ay wala ng mga magulang. Bakit? Heto sasabihin ko na. Nakakulong ang tunay kong nanay sa Mandaluyong, yung Correctional Institute for Women. 20 years ata ang sentensiya na dahil sa kasong Estafa. Ang aking tatay naman ay nagbabanat ng buto sa Saudi, at doon, hindi namin alam kung may iba na siyang pamilya. Pero nagpapadala pa 'din naman siya ng pera upang ako'y makapag-aral at upang may magastos kami sa araw-araw. Matagal na kasing hiwalay ang aking mga magulang, simula pa noong nakulong ang nanay ko. Matagal na siya nakakulong. Siguro, humigit isang dekada na. Natatandaan ako, pitong taon pa lang ako noong nakulong siya. Batang-bata. Hindi pa alam kung anu ang mga nangyayari sa mundo. Grade 1 pa lang ako noon. Pero ang masakit, nakita ko ang nanay ko na dinampot ng mga pulis. Umiiyak, ayaw kaming iwan. Nakatulala lang ako at hindi makagalaw sa aking kinatatayuan noong mga panahon na iyon. Hindi ko kasi alam kung anung nangyayari.

Noong ako'y nagkaroon na ng tamang malay upang maunawaan ang mga bagay-bagay sa aking paligid, saka ko na lang nalaman na nakulong nga ang aking nanay. Ewan ko ba, pero wala akong naramdamang lungkot. Tawagin ninyo na akong isang masamang anak ngunit hindi man lang pumatak ang aking luha sa aking mga mata. Siguro kasi, lumaki ako na wala siya. Lumaki ako na hindi malapit ang loob ko sa kanya. Lumaki ako na ang Mama ko na ang nag-aalaga sa akin.

Ang Mama ko na, na hindi na nakapag-asawa para lang alagaan kami. Ang Mama ko na ipinagpalit ang lahat ng kanyang kaligayahan upang may mag-alaga lang sa aming magkakapatid. Ang Mama ko na napakabait. Ang Mama ko na madasalin. Ang Mama ko na nagturo sa akin upang maging isang mabuting tao. Hindi ba, yung ibang kabataan, kapag lumaki ng walang magulang, napapabayaan ang kanilang sarili at naliligaw ng kanilang mga landas? Ngunit ako? Kami? Hindi. Alam namin ang tama sa mali. Alam namin na kailangan naming mag-aral upang matumbasan ang lahat ng paghihirap ng aking ama na matiyagang nagbabanat ng buto sa Saudi. Hindi madali ang pera. Hindi madali ang buhay. Iyan lamang ang mga magagandang aral na napulot ko sa aking Mama. Kaya kahit ganito ako minsan, nagiinom, alam ko pa 'din ang aking mga responsibilidad bilang isang kabataan. Inaamin ko naman eh, may mga kalokohan din ako sa utak pero hindi yung sagad-sagaran.

Ang Mama ko... Hay napakasuwerte ko talaga sa kanya! Napakasuwerte talaga namin sa kanya! Siya ang nagsilbing gabay sa aming paglaki, ang nagsilbing ilaw sa aming mga madidilim na gabi. Mahal na mahal namin siya, kahit hindi namin ito masabi sa kanya. Hindi man niya kami mga tunay na anak, feeling namin na sa kanya pa 'din kami nanggaling. Ang pagiging ina, hindi naman kailangan na sa iyong sinapupunan mo talaga nanggaling. Minsan nga, sa iyo na nga nanggaling ang bata, pinapabayaan mo pa. Pero siya? Tinuring niya kami higit pa sa isang tunay na anak.

Basta, mahal na mahal na mahal na mahal namin siya! :)

Insomniac

2009-05-09T07:56:00.000-07:00

Here I am in front of the computer again. I am alone here in the living room as usual. People here in this creepy old house are sleeping - except me, of course. I never hit the sheets as early as eleven in the evening. I usually call it a night when the clock says that it's 6 am in the morning. My bro told me awhile ago, while my brain is still clouded, that I have insomnia. Although I'm a little bit of a sleepyhead that time, I still can remember what my brother told about me being an insomniac. Okay so now I honestly admit that I am an insomniac. Like, it's a big deal. But other people said that you could die when you lack of sleep. Okay, so a typical, healthy and obviously normal human would sleep for about 6-8 hours while me, the weirdest human in this entire universe, would sleep for only 4 hours everyday. It's like, I'm a celebrity who's got a lot of appointments that's why I never had the chance to sleep. Might as well purchase that bottle of sleeping pills on the shelf of the drug store so I finally had this good night's sleep for the very first time in my life. I just hope that I could sleep as early as midnight - and that, for me, I will consider a miracle.

Hi! I'm Chazzel.

2009-05-08T03:49:00.000-07:00

Hello there fellow blogger/s! I really, really want to introduce myself to you guys and since I can be open with just about anything and everything, I also want to be open about my life so that you'll get to know more about me (Who cares?! Haha).

First of all, my full name is Chazzel Rojo Soriano. I was born on April 28, 1992 in Cavite City. My parents are Corazon Rojo Soriano and Rolando Convento Soriano. I am currently residing in Kawit, Cavite - which served as my hometown for the past seventeen years of my existence. I got two older siblings namely Kristofferson Soriano and Corrine Soriano. My kuya is 28 and my ate is 25 and I'm 17. Yeah, the gap's long, alright. My zodiac sign is Taurus.

I learned to read at 3 but I still have no idea what age did I learn to speak. I went to school at 4 in Emilio Aguinaldo Elementary School. It's just a few blocks away from our house. When I was 5, my mom transferred me to St. Mary Magdalene School and I stayed there 'til my last year of high-school. I am currently taking up Bachelor of Science in Information Technology (BSIT) at St. Dominic College of Arts and Sciences but will transfer to STI Bacoor. Haha, I still can't believe that I'm now an irregular student. But it's okay. At least I'm not an irregular student because of my failing grades, right?

My favorite colors are Red, Pink, Green, White and Black. I listen to Rock Music - any genre even Death Metal! :). I am a cam-wh*re and yes, I like taking pictures of myself and I admit it, thank you. I also adore photography. Well, on my wishlist would include that spankin' new high definition Sony DSL-R camera. I really don't know how to use that Adobe Photoshop - but as an IT student, I'm working on it. I hate programming, though but THANK GOD I GET GOOD GRADES BECAUSE I WANT TO LEARN. I hate it when the professors are absent. You see, you pay thousands of pesos for such a piece of crap and your wasted effort? Nah-ah! I really have this passion to learn. I WANT TO LEARN SO MUCH BECAUSE I BELIEVE THAT KNOWLEDGE IS THE STRONGEST WEAPON YOU COULD EVER HAVE TO BE SUCCESSFUL IN YOUR LIFE.

I like reading encyclopedias and books. Novels had served as my inspiration to improve my writing. Yes, believe it or not, I'm a writer or should I say, I'm a so-called writer? Haha. Nevermind. I joined the Magdalenean (our school paper) and fortunately, I've been appointed as the Features Editor and that is the greatest accomplishment in my life! I joined competitions in and out of Cavite. I became the first placer (oh no, I'm not bragging about that) on Feature Writing in English on the Division Schools Press Conference Training in Perpetual Molino, Cavite and again - oh I hate this - the first placer in the Divison Schools Press Conference (that's the real deal!) in Imus Pilot Elementary School, Imus Cavite. I then competed in the Regional Schools Press Conference under the same category in Calamba, Laguna but unfortunately, I LOST! But that's okay. It's not everyday that you win the battle. Sometimes, you have to experience lost so that you'll improve next time and that is for your own good sake, right?.

I am the vocalist of the band Ampersand but we disbanded due to my transferring to another school mantra but I plan to form another band in my school if luck would permit me to do so. I play the guitar but I swear, I'm not that good. I can also pluck the bass guitar but let's forget about it. I'm not getting any better. Haha.

I am a self-confessed kikay but not that much. I like make-up but I don't like to wear super duper girly clothes. You can usually spot me in a t-shirt and jeans. It's better to be simple than to be fashionable - and it's only my opinion so to fashionistas out there, please forgive me for saying that, oh I beg you! What's more? I adore Bob Ong. I'm sure all of you guys out there adore him, too. Haha. Admit it!.

I like to eat, that's why I'm getting fat. But I don't mind. It's better to look like a pig than to look like a living dead. I don't want to look anorexic, of course. But forgive me again patriotic people - I don't usually eat Filipino dishes. I don't know. Maybe, I'm not fond of soups and veggies. But I eat salad, though. Pig-out, pig-out that's what I always do when I'm bored. But I thank my metabolism this summer vacation for it doesn't yearn too much on food. Haha. I've lost 5 pounds and I never plan on losing more calories, thank you very much.

I am an old soul. I like anything vintage. Elvis Presley, The Beatles, Manilyn Monroe, Frank Sinatra, Michael Jackson - and you name the godly music legends! Oh well, I ADORE MANNY PACQUIAO! I think he's the best boxer in the whole wide universe! Be proud guys that we're Filipino! :).

I have to admit that I can sometimes be a bad girl. Sure, I drink but not that much. I know the word DRINK MODERATELY. I love my liver, thank you. :). I'm still God-fearing, responsible and I love my studies and I wouldn't exchange my dignity for anything that can fulfill a human's materialistic desires. So I guess, that's too much. :). Now you know something about me. :DD

My precious moments at SDCAS

2009-05-07T01:41:00.000-07:00

Shara, Me and Kenneth.

Our NSTP Class. :)

Naaalala ko, may hang-over ako niyan.
Sa labas ng 7/Eleven Binakayan, Cavite
at 3 am in the morning. After ng swimming yan.

Okay, Mike's doing that pose again.

Me and Chester noong nag-swimming kami sa
Cherry's.

Me, Fridz (playing the guitar) and Dindin.
Yes, we're singing onstage on the
Dominicans got talent show last December.
We sang 'My Immortal' Acoustic Version.

Our NSTP Class at Longos, Bacoor. Kenneth, Me and Vyron.
Ayaw pa magpakuha. Maarte kasi si Vyron.

Our Karakol Festival. I'm the leader
so that's why I'm wearing that
silly thing on my head. Darn.

Generoso! :)

My favorite pic!
From left to right: Johanne, Shara, Marlon,
Neren, Kenneth, Me and Dindin.

Doing this goofy pose with Shara, Kenneth and Dindin.
That's outside Neren's boarding house.

Our NSTP Class. Ewan ko, biglang napasinget
si Glenn eh wala naman siyang NSTP niyan.

Me, Micah and Shara while waiting for our
pizza sa Green Cab.

Me, Shara and Abie on the 7th Floor
after our English class.

My forever gross but cool guy friends: Mike,
Vyron, Glenn and Davin. :)

My first bunch of tropa from SDCAS: Micah,
Shara, Imelda and Davin.

Haha! Me and Abie. Hindi talaga mawawala ang
inuman sa amin. Ewan ko ba.

I remember that's our English class when
I took this picture. On the picture with me are:
Strawberry, Analita and Camille.

Our P.E Class. The BSIT 1-A students.

On the first row: Davin.
On the second row from left to right: Blanca, Dindin,
Glenn and Me.
On the third row from left to right: Micah, Emily and Kenneth.

Yan ang Group nila Shara and Dindin.
That's our CPU Troubleshooting exam.

Si Abie holding our F*cked up MIS Thesis.
Damn.

That's 4 am in the morning. Tulog na sina
Mike, Raymart at Kenneth.

Vyron naglalagay na ng red horse sa pitcher.

Goof! Goof! Goof. Haha. That's one of our
inuman sessions pics.

Eating lunch sa classroom.

Mike and Me. Lumabas lang kami
ng classroom niyan kasi bored na kami with
our Algebra class.

I took this picture noong pababa kami ng bangin.
That's Fridz, Kenneth, Ronald and Emily down there.

The FACK Society: Fuki, Amag, Cheesesticks, Karot.
They're my SDCAS Friends.

Before going to Tau Gamma Phi SDCAS Chapter's
Anniversary. Eto yung tambayan namin, yung bilyaran.
Extra pa yung mga Triskelion na guys sa likod
namin.
From left to right: Lorraine, Me, Paula, Rose and Rachelle.
On the background: Vic, Wong, Maeng and Micz.

My Band! Ampersand! :)

Me with my friends hanging out at Neren's boarding house.

Me and Neren bathing in the rain. It was so much fun!

On the first row: Neren and Camille.
On the second row: Emily, Me and Abie.
It was Neren's birthday when we took that
picture. I think it was last March 19.
Nag-overnight swimming kami noon sa Cherry's.

From left to right: Camille, Abie and Me
before our PE Class.

Ronald and Me, bathing at the river.
That's after breakfast. We decided to do
something fun to de-stress.

Me and Fridz (He's pretending that he's sleeping
for the sake of this picture). It was taken noong
nag-overnight kami kayna Emily at Molino, Cavite.

On the first row from left to right:
Shara, Camille and Me.
On the second row from left to right:
Neren, Emily, Dindin, Julie and Blanca.

Me fooling around sa class.

From left to right: Emily, Shara, Kenneth, Me and
Erwin. Uso ang shades nung last day ng Pre-Finals.

From left to right: Kenneth, Neren, Johanne and
Me. Sa aming overnight inuman sessions.

Micah and Me with Imelda's hands.
We're forming a heart.

Our Retreat in Oasis of Prayer, Silang, Cavite
with some of my BSIT 1-A Classmates.

Me and Vyron with our plastic Shrek, our robot project
in ITC 2 (Computer Application).

Ronald, Me and Emily at the bus. On the way
papunta sa bahay namin.

Waiting for a tricycle at Manggahan, Binakayan, Cavite.
I'm with Abie at that time. 3 am in the morning na yan.

Shara, Neren and Me at Neren's Boarding House

Damn. It doesn't stop beating.

2009-05-06T07:01:00.000-07:00

Habang kasalukuyan kong tinatype ang post na ito, naghihintay pa 'din ako ng text niya. Kasalukuyan umaasa. Kasalukuyan akong may pangamba. Hindi ko alam, bakit may kirot sa puso ko? Samantalang hindi ko naman akalain na mararamdaman ko ito. Ayoko na. Isang malaking AYOKO NA! Isang malaking pagkakamali. Isang malaking sugal ang ilaban ang iyong puso. Masusugatan ito. Magdurugo. Aasa. Hindi na aasa, ngunit sa huli ay aasa pa 'din. Bakit ba kasi kailangang magmahal? Bakit ba hindi na lamang maging bato ang puso ko? Lagi naman ako ganito, laging malas sa love life. Sabi nila, 'wag ko daw damdamin. Masyado pa 'daw akong bata upang isipin ang mga ganyang bagay. Pero kadalasan, hindi mo talaga ito maiiwasan. Mahal kita. Mahal na mahal kita. Sige na, aaminin ko na kung anu yung nandito sa loob ko. Mahal na mahal talaga kita. Hindi naman ako naluluha... pero umaasa pa 'rin ako. Mas masakit ang nasa loob mo kesa lumuha ka, hindi ba?

Mga maiinit na isyu ngayon

2009-05-05T08:38:00.000-07:00

Hola Chikka! Madaming mga maiinit na isyu ngayon sa ating bansa na paulit - ulit nating naririnig sa balita ngayon. Pansin ko lang, bakit hindi ko kaya gawan ng article ang mga maiinit na isyu? Just a flashback lamang, para sa ating mga kababayan na makakabasa ng blog post na ito. And since that I can be a commentarist, bibigyan ko din ng mga kumento ang mga isyu na ito in my own brutally honest opinion. So, anu-anu nga ba ang mga chikka na kumakalat sa ating bansa sa ngayon?

Manny "Pacman" Pacquiao beats Englishman
Ricky "The Hitman" Hatton in just 2 Rounds!

Obvious naman na ito na ang pinakamainit na isyu ngayon sa ating bansa. Ang pagkaka-knockout ni Manny Pacquiao kay Ricky "The Hitman" Hatton bilang agawin ang titulo na bagong WBC IBO Super Welterweight Champion. Ang prediction pa nga ng coach at trainer ni Pacman na si Freddie Roach, 3 Rounds lang ay knock out na si Hatton - pero akalain mo nga ba na Two Rounds lang ang itatagal ng laban! And with Pacman's killer left jab on Ricky Hatton's jaw, ayun tumba agad siya! Ang masasabi ko lang dito, sana araw-araw na lang ang laban ni Pacman. Kita niyo, ceasefire ang Abu Sayyaff at ang Philippine Marines at naireport 'din ng PNP na 0% ang crime rate noong linggo. Aba, tumigil ang mundo tuwing laban ni Pacman!

The "Swine Flu" virus or the AH1N1 Virus

Nakakakaba talaga ang ambang pagkalat na tinatawag na AH1N1 Virus na ito na nagsimula sa mga baboy na tinawag nilang Swine Flu hanggang sa naging carrier na 'din ang tao sa pambihirang influenza na ito. Mexico is said to be the ground zero of the virus, with many people reporting the cases of hundreds of deaths in their country. Kumalat ito papuntang US, Canada at Hong Kong - at ang Department of Health ay nangangamba 'din na baka pumunta ang virus na ito sa Pilipinas. Nakakakaba talaga. Napanood ko sa news awhile ago that there are three individuals who are now quarantined because they have shown symtomps of influenza in Cebu. Hay, sana naman ay huwag itong kumalat - dahil if this one's a worse virus than SARS or Meningococcemia, maybe the human race will be put into its extinction. Parang, this is the Omega since the Alpha.

The so-called infomercials of the 2010 Elections
Candidates

Eto pa ang isang pinagtatalunan ngayon: The so-called infomercials of the 2010 Elections Candidates. Kumakalat na talaga ang mga infomercials na ito sa TV. Commercial ni Manny Villar, Gibo Teodoro (Department of National Defense), Jejomar Binay (Makati Mayor) at ang pinakapopular ay yung Mr. Padyak "infomercial daw" ni Mar Roxas. Kung ako ang tatanungin, wala naman talaga ikaw makukuha na information doon sa commercial ni Mar Roxas. It's just like, he's bragging about something at talaga namang obvious na nagpapahiwatig siya ng candidacy, right? Dapat, i-ban na ang mga commercials na kagaya nito dahil ayon sa COMELEC, Hindi pa naman period ng campaign ngayon. As a senator, dapat he knows how to abide the law. Pero hindi lang siya ang dapat tumigil sa paggawa ng mga so-called infomercials na ito... Dapat pati na 'din yung mga head ng mga Department natin dito sa Pinas. Malayo pa ang kampanya, mga tsong! Itigil muna natin ito.

Korina Sanchez and Mar Roxas' engagement

Hanep 'din itong si Mar Roxas! Talagang sa public pa nagpakita ng pa-sweet effect niya sa sikat na broadcaster na si Korina Sanchez. We all know that they're a couple for like, six years or something now and it's a wonder kung bakit ngayon lang niya naisip magpakasal sila ni Korina (I'm talking about Mar Roxas here). Siguro, kapag nangampanya na talaga si Mar Roxas, si Korina na yung isasakay niya sa pedicab. Siguro, puwede yun since sikat naman si Korina and she's a very influential person, magiging effective siguro siya para iboto ulit ng tao si Mar Roxas - and this time, as a Philippine President.

Martin Nievera's bad singing of the
Philippine National Anthem
in the Pacquiao-Hatton fight

We all know that Martin Nievera is the so-called Concert King. Siya pa nga yung kumanta noong laban nina Pacquiao at Hatton. Nagreact naman ang mga pasikat na masyadong patriotic na mga pulitiko saying that Martin Nievera's rendition of the Philippine National Anthem is bad. Okay, so for me, it's not that bad and it's not that good. Parang, in between lang. Pero hindi naman siguro pambababoy yung ginawa ni Martin Nievera sa pagkanta ng National Anthem natin. Wala naman siyang binagong lyrics, wala naman siyang ginawang masama so that's about it. He just sang there with the best of his ability at bakit pa nila kailangang kuwestiyonin? Napakaexagg naman ng mga rules dito sa Pilipinas na kapag binastos na yung kanta ng National Anthem, makukulong ka ng 1 year or so. Fine, irespeto natin ang National Anthem natin - pero wala sa lugar kasi yung pagbabatikos nila kay Martin Nievera eh.

The Trina Etong Case

So, alam naman nating lahat na pumanaw na si Trinidad "Trina" Etong, wife of the popular broadcaster and the brave commentarist, Ted Failon. Ang sinasabi ng QCPD (Quezon City Police Distric) is that, may mga kinalaman ang mga kasambahay nito o kaya si Ted Failon sa pagkamatay ni Trina Etong. Yung ibang forensic experts, sinasabi nila na suicide is the cause of her death. Yes, I believe with the forensic experts' conclusion. Paano naman magagawa ni Ted Failon ang crime kung nandoon siya sa radio station? Hindi ba? Basta, para sa akin, suicide is the cause. Halatang halatang suicide na naman eh. We all know that this woman has a financial problem. Hindi na siguro nakayanan ang problema, kaya ayun, naisip niya na lang na bawiin ang kanyang sariling buhay. Anyways, let's pray for her soul so that she may rest in peace.

Manny Pacquiao's plan to run as a
Congressman in his new hometown,
Saranggani Province

Alam naman nating lahat na from a kid from General Santos City, lumipat na si Pacman ng residency sa Saranggani Province, Mindanao. At ngayon, nagbabalak siya pumasok ng pulitika. Congressman na naman, again. Matapos matalo noong nakaraang halalan, muli na naman bang susubok si Pacman na ma-knock out ulit for the second time? We know that he's a great pound-for-pound boxing champion at ka-rank na nga niya si Mohammad Ali sa popularity, pero magiging hari pa 'din kaya siya sa pulitika? I don't really think so. Magaling na siya sa boxing. Mayaman na siya. Sikat na siya. Kilala na siya ng mga Hollywood Actors pati ni Batista at kung sinu-sinu pang popular celebrities, bakit nanaisin pa niyang magventure into politics? If he wants to help people, pwede naman siyang makatulong sa mga less fortunate in his own way. Hindi na niya kailangan ng pulitika. Dapat, hindi siya magpaudyok sa mga taong ito na gagamitin lang siya for their own good.

Wait for what?

2009-05-04T22:27:00.000-07:00

Wait for what? Wait 'til my heart stops beating? Wait for forever when all is left of forever is the ashes of the past? Wait for the sun to come when all I can see in my life is this miserable storm? Wait for the love to come back when I'm running away from you? Oh no, I just don't know what to do. I am a fool. I betrayed my heart. I tormented everything inside of me. I tortured my own self. I hate myself.

Oh No!

2009-05-04T08:53:00.000-07:00

What's done is done. I could not make the clock freeze... nor could I turn back the time to make everything fall right into place. But if I do not possess this kind of great wisdom, let me make things right as soon as there is tomorrow that will come in this world of menaces and darkness. Let me find solace in your arms, so that I could be free of this eternal melancholy. Yes, I am a human and I am aware of my frailty. I believe lies, but somewhere, over the abyss of questions, I still find truth for me to be happy. When will I be happy when all that surrounds me is the ghost of the past, still haunting me even in my deepest dreams?

This is what I'm feeling today. Hayst, sige, pa-emo effect na naman ako. Idaan na lang yan sa poetry. :(. I'm always, always prone on making the wrong decision pero sana I could make everything right. I know I can. I believe in me.

Dogs! :)

2009-05-03T22:07:00.000-07:00

Hi Guys! I just want to share you this cutest picture in the world that I've found in the Philippine Pet Finder website. If you're looking for a pet, then that is the website you should go to! Any pet is available there from dogs to cats to iguanas! As a self-confessed dog lover, I can't help looking for a new dog to take care of and I really, really wanna buy this Chao-Chao puppies! Yes! 6 Chao-Chao Puppies for 20Php-25Php! Too bad, it's too expensive! If only I have the money, I would not have the second thoughts to buy it. They're adorable, right? But I'll gladly introduce to you my two adorable dogs namely: Potter and Dixie. I used to have a dog named Sam, but she died of pregnancy many months ago and that, for me, is so sad. Anyway, I hope Potter will get Dixie pregnant. I'm still wondering what breed of dog Potter is, 'cause he doesn't look like your typical askal. I know Dixie's roots, by the way. Her father is pure-bred dalmatian while her mom's askal. So that makes her a mongrel - that's what you call half-breed dogs. I'll share you a pic of my two dogs but for now, I have to post a pic of Dixie 'cause I have a hard time capturing Potter. Malikot siya, as in.

Dixie - my not-so-cute dog! Mukhang askal 'yan kase ang nanay
niyan askal. Ang dumi nga eh, hindi ko napapaliguan.
Pero she's intelligent. Siya lang yung kauna-unahang puppy
namin na nakaakyat ng hagdanan namin all by herself!
How cool is that? I was thinking if she got a Jack Rusell
blood in her, too - 'cause as far as I know, Jack Rusell
Terriers are one of the most intelligent breed of dogs in the world!
Hmmm... Pwede. Kaya nga proud ako sa kanya, kahit hindi
siya maganda, matalino naman siya. Balak ko nga isali siya sa dog
shows. :)

Ready?

2009-05-03T09:23:00.000-07:00

Oh come on, Chazzel! Wag ka muna maiinlove!
As in wag muna! Enjoy mo muna pagiging single mo!
Magpapaligaw ka na ba?

Okay, ito yung mga words na sinasabi ng utak ko sa ngayon. Somebody's courting me! Somebody's courting me! Somebody's courting me! No, I'm not bragging about that but... I still can't believe na may nanliligaw ulit sa akin after ulit ako ligawan ng ex-bf ko three years ago. Hayst! Kakaibang feeling pala yung free ka ulit no. Pero I still can't bring myself to give in with his words no matter how handsome he is. Yes, sure, he's cute - pero hindi naman talaga kailangan palagi sa hitsura ko tumitingin. I told you single ladies out there, it's what deep inside that truly counts. He seems to be a nice guy naman. I like his deep voice on the phone. I spent talking to him for about three hours, and parang within those three hours, parang nafeel at ease naman ako sa kanya. Pero I want it to start with friendship and ayoko muna magjump sa isang relationship because I'm not yet ready. Yes, nakakapag-move on na ako ng unti-unti kaso feeling ko, mali pa 'din itong ginagawa ko na magpapaligaw ako. Am I doing the right thing? I still don't know.

Pacquiao wins over Hatton

2009-05-03T03:44:00.000-07:00

Ang galing talaga ni Manny Pacquiao! Akalain niyo, napatumba niya si Ricky "The Hitman" Hatton ng 2 Rounds lang. Anung panama ng Justice League kay Pacman, samantalang real-life superhero siya at may kakaibang lakas siya na parang si Hercules? Congratulations, Pacman! You're the Man! You make the Filipino people proud of your winnings and you still manage to keep yourself on the ground kahit alam na ng buong sambayanang Pilipino kung gaano ka kayaman. Anyways, Ricky Hatton is also a nice man but due to his wrong choice of trainer, nagkaroon tuloy siya ng bad image in the persona of Floyd Mayweather, Sr., Masyadong mayabang si Mayweather Old-Man. I watched Pacquiao/Hatton 24/7 on GMA 7 last night - and me and my brother is so excited that we couldn't put ourselves to sleep! We're always wondering what would happen to Pacquiao if he lose this fight because we all know Ricky Hatton is such a fierce and a strong competition of our own Filipino boxer. Pero kita niyo naman! With Pacquiao's signature left-handed punch on Hatton's jaw, Knockout agad siya! Makikita niyo naman kung gaano kalakas ang suntok na yun and it was not a camera trick. Magaling lang talaga si Pacman, kaya hinuhusgahan nung ibang tao kasi natalo yung bet nila. And I'm really, really happy because me and Zaldy won the pustahan kung sinu ang mananalo sa dalawa. Siyempre, bilib kami sa Pinoy! You're the reason why we're proud to be a Filipino, Pacman! Keep it up and always keep your feet on the ground.

P.S: I was supposed to post a video of Pacman's fight with Ricky Hatton, but unfortunately, I couldn't find anything in YouTube except Pacman's previous fights with Mexican boxers. Whew. Tell me if you've found anything on YouTube because I was too lazy to search. :)

Mga rason kung bakit masaya maging single

2009-05-02T04:46:00.000-07:00

Me and my ex last December 24, 08

Call me anything you want, guys. Bitter. Loser. Loner. Eh obvious naman, sa pagkakabura ko palang ng mukha niya sa picture above eh bitter na talaga ako. Oo, inaamin ko naman. May natitira pa 'din pagmamahal ako para sa kanya pero you can't take away the bitterness that fast. And five days pa lang naman kami nagbebreak so that answers all of my questions kung bakit hanggang ngayon ay bitter pa 'din ako. Anyways, marami naman rason kung bakit kelangang magcelebrate ang lahat ng single ladies out there. Calling all the single ladies! Let's gather up in here! I'll give you the reasons why it rocks to be single:

1. Obviously, you have more time with your family and friends.
2. Makakapagsave-up ka ng enough money for your self! Hindi mo na minsan kelangang magworry kung may pera ka ba o wala sa tuwing magdedate kayo. Siyempre, hindi naman sa lahat ng oras, may pera ang jowa mo kaya kailangan mo din magambag.
3. You can meet all sorts of guys without worrying if your man will get angry. 'Nuff said.
4. You can party all night like you just don't care!
5. You can go to the salon almost every week without your man worrying if you have another guy kaya ka nagpapaganda.
6. Maisusuot mo ang kahit anung gusto mong suotin kasi walang makikielam sa'yo.
7. Hindi mo na kailangang bumili ng sako-sakong gamot sa botika sa tuwing hahaybladin ka, or sasakit ang ulo mo sa tuwing magaaway kayo.
8. You can go out with your friends anytime you want! Halos lahat ng time mo, nasa kanila.
9. You can try out a new hobby and you'll have more time for yourself to discover your inner talent.
10. You'll feel good about yourself.

Ayan, binigay ko na ang mga rason kung bakit patok maging single! :).

Dreams do come true

2009-05-02T01:07:00.000-07:00

Dreams do come true.

Parang kanta lang, no? Pero hindi. Ngayon ko lang narealize na totoo pala minsan ang mga panaginip at hindi ito nabubuo dahil lang sa ating imahinasyon. Sabi ng ibang tao, kaya mo napapanaginipan ang isang bahay dahil ito'y iniisip mo, pero sila'y nagkakamali. The reason why you dreamed of something or someone is because it will serve as a sign, either a warning or a good sign, that will happen into your life in the future. And how do I attest to my theory regarding dreams? The answer: Most of my realistic dreams happened in the real life. Nangyari na. Katulad na lamang ng napanaginipan ko ang aking ex-boyfriend na si Sherwin na may kasamang iba, at nag-break na kami afterward. In real life, although wala naman akong nakitang infidelity as the cause of our break-up, the break-up happened. I dreamed of it for so many times that it served as a warning sign for the ultimatum of our relationship. Then came this dream, after breaking up with Sherwin, that I've met a really, really cute guy at STI (my new school this semester) and he became my boyfriend. The day that I've dreamed about this mysterious young man, I've met a friend of a friend. I don't wanna mention the name 'cause it's really embarrassing. He's not your boy-next-door type but I find him cute and manly. I have this crush on him but I've got a feeling that it will be just for a very short period of time. My friend said that the guy liked me back - but I don't think so and I don't have any idea. And the last dream that I've had for this day is terrifying! Napanaginipan ko na namatay 'daw yung nanay ko, and somebody sent me a text message telling me all about the news. Hindi ko naman talaga kilala 'yung babaeng namatay pero sa panaginip alam kong nanay ko siya. And what happened in real life? My Auntie Lodia from Bacolod gave me a ring this morning telling this shocking news: My Uncle Omie, from Italy, had undergone his brain operation due to the clotting of his blood passages. Buti na lang 'daw naagapan dahil kung hindi, puede siya ma-stroke or the worst, die. Hay, God is so good pa 'rin talaga! Hindi niya pinabayaan si Uncle na mawala sa amin. Yes, all good people deserve to live longer. And the last but not the last of my dream: Swine flu. Yes! The Swine Flu scare. Nagkaroon 'daw ng three victims ng Swine Flu dito sa Pinas! OMG! And the people turned into terrifying zombies like the infected in the movie 28 Days Later! Oh no. Sana naman 'huwag ito mangyare dahil feeling ko talaga, mayroon akong extra-sensory perception na nangyayari yung mga napanaginipan ko (although not clearly) sa totoong buhay. Let's pray to God that all bad things will come into an end.

Vampire Madness

2009-05-01T09:19:00.000-07:00

Twilight Saga Madness is everywhere and we cannot deny it. I'm not personally a fan of Stephenie Meyer's series, but I don't say I don't like it - it's just that I'm not a fan of it. I do appreciate her way of writing and her creative imagination rather than just appreciating it for the sake of its popularity - and a true writer (not that I say that I am a writer) knows it. A writer is not a writer without an inspiration and the Twilight Saga had served as an inspiration to start my own vampire novel but with a different perspective to what Stephenie Meyer's perspective of a vampire is. This unpopular and not exactly your taste novel is entitled: The South Green Island Vampires. I'm not finished of it yet because I am thinking a lot of scenes that would make the story long. It's supposed to be a short story but due to my sense of boredom and I really, really wanna challenge myself to see if I will be able to finish a novel, I decided that I should go for it and never think about of my previous plan. My story still has the Twilight feel on it - but compared to its not so brutal scenes, I decided to make the story as real as it gets and a real vampire story isn't complete without lots of gore and lots of blood to stimulate the mind and the senses. Just wish me luck this time, guys!

Single ako! Single ako! Single ako!

2009-05-01T08:34:00.000-07:00

I never thought that after two years and eight months (ang tagal!) of togetherness, a relationship that seems to be a match made from heaven would have to, well - end.

Ngayon, single na ako. Single and ready to mingle. I always blame myself for being such a fool for being too blind because I really never saw it coming. I should have seen the signs but I know I can't do anything to turn it around because our love story is over and it's perfectly over that it's time for me to move on.
Well, it's always hard to move on and ask yourself if you could survive even a night without that special someone. Oh, he's always been a part of my life and forever will be a very special part of it. Ang dami, dami ko pa din regrets kahit wala na kami. Sana, hindi na lang ako naging ganito... Sana hindi na lang ako naging ganyan... Sana, I never took him for granted... Sana, inintindi ko na lang siya... Sana, marami akong alam sa nursing. There's a lot of shoulda, woulda and coulda's that it makes me very insane just to think about it. Pero ang pinakabest part dito, sa pagiging single ko, is to love myself more than anything else in this world. Hindi lang naman ako ang kaisa-isang tao na nawalan ng minamahal. Marami diyan at yung iba, mas worse pa yung break-up nila. You know, cases like physical abuse, mental abuse, infidelity and just simply not finding anything in common between each other. Ang dahilan lang naman kasi ng break-up namin is... not finding enough time to hang-out with each other. Well, it's on his side. He couldn't find any time with me because of him being busy with his studies. Ganoon ba talaga kahirap ang nursing? Ganoon ba talagang katoxic? Bakit naman yung iba, nagwowork pa din ang relationship nila kahit sobrang busy sa kanikanilang buhay? I personally think that it is a pathetic excuse. Sabi ng mga friends ko, baka 'daw ang cause ng break-up namin ay third party. I don't really want to believe it 'cause it friggin' hurts. Well, what's done is done and what's over is over. I've gotta move on and find a new life on my own. Pinanganak ako na ako lang mag-isa, kakayanin ko 'tong mag-isa. Pero sa totoo lang, secretly, iniisip ko pa 'din na sana magkabalikan kami. Iniisip ko din na marerealize niya na mahirap pala talaga na wala ako sa tabi niya. Sa dinami-dami ba namang pinagsamahan namin, di'ba? Mahal na mahal ko pa 'din siya and I can't deny it. Pero hindi na ako masyadong nalulungkot ngayon. Hindi ko na 'din siya iniiyakan. Tapos na eh. Ang sakit na at yung sakit na yun, ginamit ko yun para maging mas strong pa ako. Ang dami dami pa diyan na mas better pa. Pero am I ready to start a new relationship again? No. I don't think so. I think I'm better off alone. I'm glad my friends are with me to keep me company whenever I'm feeling down. Mas hindi ko siguro makakaya kapag sila yung nawala sa akin. And I've got so much more time bonding with my family. Being single has never been this good! Halos three years 'din ako naging UN-single kaya namimiss ko itong buhay na 'to. Inaamin ko, I can still feel the bitterness inside of me pero wala na akong magagawa eh. May own life na 'din siya and I've got my own, too. And now I'm feeling stronger.